Dr. van der Kolk stated, “The bodies of child-abuse victims are tense and defensive until they find a way to relax and feel safe.” When I started trying to take better care of myself, I decided to get a massage. The first time, and several after to be honest, were not very pleasant or relaxing. I would often still feel just as tense or even more so when it was over. The masseuse would keep saying, “You can relax now,” and I would be so confused because I thought I was relaxed.
A lot of assumptions are hurled at only children. People just assume you’re a spoiled brat who has been handed everything you could ever want in life. They just assume things were calm and peaceful in your household because it was just you and your parents must have been so attentive to your every whim. They assume you’re socially awkward and don’t know how to make friends or interact with people. They assume you’re still spoiled as an adult and have always had a great support system. That was not my experience whatsoever.
Don’t let people who are afraid to live their own lives tell you how to live yours!
Today, I’m so grateful for my disease and the constant struggles it has brought into my life. I’m stronger than Crohn’s disease and it took going through hell for me to realize that for myself. Now I use what I have learned through the many hardships and tough lessons I’ve experienced throughout my life to help others find a way out of the darkness.
Don’t let pain keep you from the life you want.